"Canada can't help us anyway. They have no military to speak of. And the socialistic system they have there has nearly bankrupted them. So Chretien is history. A new administration is upcoming. "
- Bill O'Reilly, December 11, 2003. Canada's budget surplus for the fiscal year 2002-2003 was, in fact, $7 billion.
"For most Americans, Canada is sort of like a case of latent arthritis. We really don't think about it, unless it acts up."
- Conservative pundit and politician Pat Buchanan, 1992.
"Frankly, I'm worried about Canada beginning to look like Mexico as a major supplier of drugs into the United States."
- Bush drug czar John Walters on Canada's push toward decriminalizing marijuana.
"Soviet Canuckistan."
- Conservative pundit and failed politician Pat Buchanan describes Canada, 2002.
"Al Gore and lawsuit tycoon Joel Hyatt today launched their cable television network. And talk about outsourcing: Our friends in Canada - or, as Homer Simpson calls it, 'America Junior' - are supplying the broadcast fodder."
- Right wing talk show host Michael Savage.
"Canada is, quite simply, not a serious country anymore... And that's why a little invasion is precisely what Canada needs. In the past, Canada has responded to real threats with courage and conviction (some say more Canadians went south to enlist for war in Vietnam than Americans went north to dodge it). If the U.S. were to launch a quick raid, blow up some symbolic but unoccupied structure -- Toronto's CN Tower, or an empty hockey stadium -- Canada would rearm overnight. "
- American conservative Jonah Goldberg, from Bomb Canada, National Review, November 25, 2002.
"Friendly as they generally are, Canadians have always made me uncomfortable. There's something a shade off about them. They remind me of the aliens in sci-fi movies who move about undetected among the human population until they're tripped up by some joke or colloquialism they haven't been programmed to understand."
- CNN host Tucker Carlson, from Chapter 1 of his book Politicians, Partisans, and Parasites.
"The biggest problems in the world, arguably, could be laid at the feet of the elite. You know, can I give you an example of the elite? Dominique de Villepin, Kofi Annan, Jacques Chirac, the guy that runs Canada, Jean Chretien... Who? [talking to director] What? Okay, Paul... whatever..."
- Rush Limbaugh forgetting the name of the Canadian Prime Minister, April 19, 2004.
"Most Canadian physicians who are themselves in need of surgery, for example, scurry across the border to get it done right: the American way. They have found, through experience, that state medical care is too expensive, too slow and inefficient, and, most important, it doesn't provide adequate care for most people."
- Conservative Rush Limbaugh gets the facts wrong in his book Told You So. Limbaugh has been unable to produce even a single anecdotal example of a Canadian doctor who came to the U.S. for any kind of medical treatment.
"There's no question that the Canadian press has become rabidly anti-American. The Toronto Globe and Mail, the CBC and others delight in insulting us. That, of course, is their right... [But] Canada is totally dependent on the USA for its economic well-being. It best remember that in this very serious situation."
- Fox News host Bill O'Reilly on the Canadian media, April 28, 2004.
"I got nothing against the Canadian people but in the last few years you've swung dramatically to the left, and we in America have some questions about that."
- Fox News host Bill O'Reilly on Canada,
May 2004.
"Canadians should understand that storm clouds are gathering to the south. Humiliating American kids in a hockey rink is simply not acceptable. Thumbing your nose at 127 dead Americans in Iraq by making defiant statements about where Saddam should be extradited is not a wise policy... One more cheap shot, one more unnecessary taunt, one more insult directed at the USA by you or your minions, and I'll give you a very accurate long-range forecast. It's gonna get mighty cold mighty fast west of the St. Lawrence."
- Fox News host Bill O'Reilly threatens Canada because of the nation's stance against the Iraq War, April 19, 2003. Good to know that the Maritimes will spared Bill's wrath.
"They [Canada] better hope the United States doesn't roll over one night and crush them. They are lucky we allow them to exist on the same continent."
- Conservative pundit Ann Coulter on the November 30 2004 edition of FOX News' Hannity & Colmes
"Conservatives, as a general matter, take the position that you should not punish your friends and reward your enemies. And Canada has become trouble recently... It's -- I suppose it's always, I might add, the worst Americans who end up going there. The Tories after the Revolutionary War, the Vietnam draft dodgers after Vietnam. And now after this election, you have the blue-state people moving up there."
- Conservative pundit Ann Coulter on the November 30 2004 edition of FOX News' Hannity & Colmes
"We could have taken them [Canada] over so easily... [But] all I want is the western portion, the ski areas, the cowboys, and the right-wingers."
- Conservative pundit Ann Coulter on the November 30 2004 edition of FOX News' Hannity & Colmes
"There is also something called, when you're allowed to exist on the same continent of the United States of America, protecting you with a nuclear shield around you, you're polite and you support us when we've been attacked on our own soil. They [Canada] violated that protocol."
- Conservative pundit Ann Coulter on the November 30 2004 edition of FOX News' Hannity & Colmes
"They don't even need to have an army, because they are protected, because they're on the same continent with the United States of America. If we were not the United States of America, Canada -- I mean, we're their trading partner. We keep their economy afloat."
- Conservative pundit Ann Coulter on the November 30 2004 edition of FOX News' Hannity & Colmes
"Because they speak French... We like the English-speaking Canadians."
- Conservative pundit Ann Coulter on the November 30 2004 edition of FOX News' Hannity & Colmes, after being asked by Newsday columnist Ellis Henican why she ridicules Canada.
"Without the U.S., Canada is essentially Honduras, but colder and much less interesting."
- American conservative pundit Tucker Carlson on the November 30 2004 edition of CNN's Wolf Blitzer Reports.
"We exploit your [addressing Canadian Member of Parliament Carolyn Parrish] natural resources, that's true. But in the end, Canadians with ambition move to the United States. That has been sort of the trend for decades. It says something not very good about Canada. And I think it makes Canadians feel bad about themselves and I understand that."
- American conservative pundit Tucker Carlson on the November 30 2004 edition of CNN's Wolf Blitzer Reports.
"Canada needs the United States. The United States does not need Canada."
- American conservative pundit Tucker Carlson on the November 30 2004 edition of CNN's Wolf Blitzer Reports.
"I think if Canada were responsible for its own security -- you would be invaded by Norway if it weren't for the United States."
- American conservative pundit Tucker Carlson on the November 30 2004 edition of CNN's Wolf Blitzer Reports.
"[A]bsolutely the countries will remain allies and there will always be politicians who see it to their benefit to stomp on Bush dolls. But no, I don't think the average Canadian feels -- the average Canadian is busy dogsledding."
- American conservative pundit Tucker Carlson on the November 30 2004 edition of CNN's Wolf Blitzer Reports.
"Canada's essentially -- essentially a made-in-Taiwan version of the United States."
- American conservative pundit Tucker Carlson on the November 30 2004 edition of CNN's Wolf Blitzer Reports.
"I'm surprised there was anybody left in Canada to attend the protests. I noticed that most sort of vigorous, ambitious Canadians, at least almost all comedians in Canada, come to the United States in the end. Doesn't that tell you something about the sort of limpid, flaccid nature of Canadian society, that people with ambition come here? What does that tell you about Canada?"
- American conservative pundit Tucker Carlson on the November 30 2004 edition of CNN's Wolf Blitzer Reports.
"[C]ould our neighbors to the north soon be our enemies? The U.S. finally losing patience with Canada. After roundly criticizing us over Iraq, Canadian politicians have taken to criticizing us over, well, pretty much everything else... So have the Canadians gotten a little bit too big for their britches?"
- Neil Cavuto, host of Fox News' Your World, introducing a segment highlighting recent remarks by Prime Minister Paul Martin that were critical of America's global environmental policies.
"The fact of the matter is -- whether it's your prime minister badmouthing this country over its refusal to sign on to the Kyoto Accord; or whether it's Iraq; or whether its tariffs we slapped on your country because we think your country is cheating on a variety of issues. It's again and again and again. What I'm asking you, whether the Canadian people hate America as much as your politicians seem to?"
- Neil Cavuto, host of Fox News' Your World, during a segment on Canada-US relations, December 14 2005. Throughout the segment, on-screen text read "CANADA: AN ENEMY OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA?"
"Here's the problem with telling Canada to stop criticizing the United States: It only eggs them on. Canada is essentially a stalker, stalking the United States, right? Canada has little pictures of us in its bedroom, right? Canada spends all of its time thinking about the United States, obsessing over the United States. It's unrequited love between Canada and the United States. We, meanwhile, don't even know Canada's name. We pay no attention at all."
- Tucker Carlson on the December 15, 2005 edition of MSNBC's The Situation with Tucker Carlson.
"First of all, anybody with any ambition at all, or intelligence, has left Canada and is now living in New York. Second, anybody who sides with Canada internationally in a debate between the U.S. and Canada, say, Belgium, is somebody whose opinion we shouldn't care about in the first place. Third, Canada is a sweet country. It is like your retarded cousin you see at Thanksgiving and sort of pat him on the head. You know, he's nice, but you don't take him seriously. That's Canada."
- Tucker Carlson on the December 15, 2005 edition of MSNBC's The Situation with Tucker Carlson.
"Can Canada really be considered our 'friend' anymore? As someone whose family comes from Canada, a country I grew up loving as a child, it pains me to ask the question. That said, what other question can be asked when the Canadian government not only willingly allows Islamic terrorists into their country, but does nothing to stop them from entering our nation."
- Former Bob Dole press secretary Douglas MacKinnon in a column in The Washington Times, December 16, 2005, repeating the lie that the September 11th terrorists entered the United States through Canada.